123Valerie Strikes Again

Unprecedented Self-Indulgence.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Good 'News' In These Parts

So, a new dog found me:



Meet Teeny. The Dodge Dog and I were out walking along when she just bumbled up to us and was like, "Hey, guys. I'm gonna hang out with you, if that's cool."

I said, "Oh, no dog. You go on now. Get." And then I noticed she had a shoelace tied around her neck, for crying out loud, and so I asked her, "Where you came from -- that wasn't a very nice place, was it?"

And she got real quiet and blinked at me. I gave in. "All right, dog. You can come with us tonight, but I'm taking you to the shelter tomorrow, deal?"

"OK," she said. "You won't even notice I'm here."

Well, tomorrow came and went. Suffice to say that Cleveland is terribly anti-Pit bull. The no-kill shelters aren't allowed to take them and the other places said, "Well, sure, we'll take her, but she's going down."

"Wait! Why? She's such a good dog!"

"Well, you can keep her, but you'll need insurance, a muzzle, a six-foot fence, and no longer than a three-foot chain to walk her."

"Not a leash? A chain?"

"A chain. See, we really don't want Pit bulls in our city."

Hell's bells, kids. I need the muzzle more than she does. So, I fretted and I researched and I called rescue organizations like For the Love of Pits. And in the meantime, Teeny and Dodger came to love each other, alternately romping and spooning.


He tolerates her sitting on his head, and she lets him chew her tail. It seems to work for them.


So, from the We Totally Saw This Coming Files, I decided to keep her, fully aware of how biased people are toward the breed. I have relied on my PR training so much in these past days, trying to dispel any myths or stereotypes we hear from people on our walks.

"Oh, those dogs are mean! Is it gonna attack me?"

"She'll kill you with kisses," I say. "Come over here and say hi to her." And by the end of it, they're enlightened and Teeny is reveling in the attention. Suffice to say we're both happy with the outcome.


So, a new dog (my lone complaint is that she eats the crotches out of my underwear, a la Murphy, but I needed some new ones anyway, so it all works out). And a new place, though I'm literally just down the street from where I was, so I can walk my laundry over to my sister's house like a real adult. I'll spare you the Moving-Is-A-Gigantic-Pain-In-The-Ass rants, but let me say that this particular move was a real doozie.

Oh, and a new 'do. I chopped off my hair and I'm back to red. It looks good and feels better.

And, lastly, I ditched the boy so I am also newly single. It also feels better.

So, to balance out all of this newness, also on the docket is a trip to Vegas at the end of the month with dear old friends Megan Jane and Camie. I haven't seen Camie in nigh 20 years, so this is going to be fun on so many levels! Pictures (possibly mug shots) to follow.

So, yeah, a full, new summer thus far. Sorry I've been such a turd when it comes to keeping up with you kids -- I figure that's what the winter is for, right? I'll settle in, hibernate for a few months and catch up on your archives.

I have fallen in love with a new favorite band The Be Good Tanyas. In the Comments section, tell me what's new with you.

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10 Comments:

  • At 4:57 PM , Blogger The Maiden Metallurgist said...

    I'm glad you're feeling good! Here's o doggies who just *insist* we get new drawers!

     
  • At 5:58 PM , Blogger WendyB said...

    What a nice big doggie smile!

    But I must say I one time was walking past a pit bull and dragged my dog Gigi away. The pit bull's bitch owner got all up in my face saying, "My dog is friendly." And I was like, "My dog is not and she will fucking eat your pit bull, you dumb ho!" and walked away in an elegant and dignified fashion.

     
  • At 7:39 AM , Blogger Goddess Adrasteia said...

    Congratulations on all accounts! And who are you to complain about crotchless underwear? ;)

     
  • At 5:14 PM , Blogger Princess Stupidhead said...

    I had a pit bull for 15 years. He was the best dog in the world and also the smartest. His real breed was Staffordshire Bull Terrier. This breed was known as "the nursemaid dog" because of their fondness and gentleness with children.

    People have made these dogs vicious - for pit fighting or today for the "status" of owning a bad dog. But they are wonderful pets with the right owners.

    I'm glad he found you!

     
  • At 10:15 PM , Blogger Nina said...

    Some pit bulls are aggressive, and some pit bulls are marshmallows. It sounds like you got a good one. Not much is new with me except that I lost a pet and gained an unexpected and wholly inexplicable zen calm about it. I am so glad you found a new friend and a perfect justification for buying scandalous new underpants. Waaaahooo!

     
  • At 9:17 AM , Blogger country roads said...

    I think your new dog is gorgeous :-)

     
  • At 3:44 PM , Anonymous What Possessed Me said...

    Hell, girl - crotchless undies might come in handy now that you're a single lady on the town. That little darling might have done you a favor.

    What a sweet gift from the gods. I love your new doggie.

     
  • At 7:04 PM , Blogger Barbara said...

    What a heart-warming story. I immediately fell in love with Teeny. Stereotyping dogs is tantamount to racial profiling. Neither should be allowed.

    (I found you through Kristin's Blog.)

     
  • At 3:53 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    Love him, miss you!

     
  • At 9:52 AM , Blogger Valerie said...

    hey- I'm Valerie too! Saw you on WendyB's blog roll :)

    Sounds like that dog is lucky to have you! In lots of cases of aggressive dogs it's a reflection of the owner, not the animal. poor pitbulls.

     

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