123Valerie Strikes Again

Unprecedented Self-Indulgence.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Gotta Dance

I've been making a conscious effort to be, well, more conscious of my true desires lately, and I've noticed that I often just want to dance.

I mean, not like ballroom dance, but when I'm at the grocery store, and I hear some BeeGees, sometimes I just want to bebop a little. So, I made a decision that when I want to dance, I dance.

Sometimes people back away slowly while I'm nodding my head and doing my little bumbling hula moves in the produce section. (I never said I was a good dancer, my pretties.) But sometimes, people see me in my mini-groove and they join in. I like that.

I usually get the happy feet when I'm at the gym, too. I get some looks, but I figure I'm burning a few more calories, right? Right.

This move to listen to what I want, regardless of how it looks to others, has had other repercussions than the boogie woogie. I had my first guitar lesson in nearly six years last week. Eeeeek.

I'm excited to learn from my teacher, Towson. He has the longest thumbnail I have ever seen, and for a 23-year-old beautiful, urban man with a head full of dreads who is likely very gay, he seemed sincere when he told me he was excited to help me develop my bluegrass techniques.

I got another heap of encouragement in the form of an e-mail from a pilot with whom I used to work and hadn't spoken with in at least five years, Paul. He got hold of some of my songs from a mutual friend and wrote to tell me how much he loved it ("It's stuff I would actually listen to."). Moreover, he was happy and proud that I was putting my music out there so I wouldn't regret not pursuing it, which I know seems funny to many of you who still haven't heard any of my stuff.

My music makes me feel very vulnerable, like anything else that I'm not entirely convinced I am good at. In that vein, the thought of playing basketball or of baking a cake frightens me because, sweet heaven above, what if I try it and fail and people realize I'm not good at everything? Oh, we humans are funny.

But, Paul was always one of my favorites and he said he remembered when I first got the guitar and was amazed at how far I'd come. Paul is probably the epitome of many women's fantasies: he's a rock star pilot, who manages to play with two bands when he's not soaring through the clouds.

Paul's kind words got me thinking that, you know, we really can have everything we want. We really can.

The only obstacle I'm encountering to that theory is I forgot when I exercise, my boobs are the first areas to shrink, which is a crying shame. I mean, it really is. But it seems I have more than enough to spare.

So, I'm just going to keep on sweating. And dancing. And singing. And strumming. And knowing that everything works out as it should (especially me).

In the Comments section, tell me what you want. What you really, really want. –Because I wanna, I wanna ziga zig ah.

Oh, some of you are still lovingly pissed off at me for my chubby confession and think I simply chose a bad photo of myself, which is true, but it's an accurately bad photo. But, here is one of my sisters and the kidders and me that I actually quite like. I find the Diet Coke highly ironic. Now, kindly take your love and concern and stuff it. Nuttin' but lurve.



  • At 8:10 AM , Blogger Nosjunkie said...

    thats cute I am gonna dance too
    I do think that people here are more likely to send you to the looney bin but hey I escaped once

  • At 9:39 AM , Blogger Kristin said...

    Um, I'm thinking about participating in a giant Thriller group dance thing. I definitely understand feeding the need to dance. Groove on with your bad self.

  • At 10:50 AM , Blogger CamiKaos said...

    I am a do what I want kind of girl. I sing out loud in front of others... not well... I dance with very little sense of grace and I make funn voices and and faces at people.

    It's good for the soul.

    What I want... is to write. And even my blog and all my scattered notebooks and word files saved on too many different computers can not satisfy that need. I don't know what ever will.

  • At 10:58 AM , Blogger My Reflecting Pool said...

    I do what I want when I want in a very controlled space and environment. I'm quirky that way!

  • At 11:47 AM , Blogger emertron said...

    Um, the awesome people are the ones who rock out at the gym. I totally dance when I jog. Inside. Outside. E'erwhere. On the eliptical machine. It's pretty awesome. And it makes you feel good & smile:) I dance down the grocery aisles, too. It embarrasses Ethan. Then he loosens up & laughs.

    You get get down with your bad self.

    Anybody who doesn't get that can suck it.

    I wouldn't mind a pudding pop right about now.

  • At 9:00 AM , Blogger Effortlessly Average said...

    Oh I so bust a move in my car nowadays, no matter who's watching. I used to only do that when no other cars were around, but I'd stop when next to another car. Now, though, I just keep right on rockin' out. And if the driver of the other car is a woman, I might just sing to her.

    oooo, what I want.... that list is long. A sample:

    -A frosty Dr. Pepper
    -To be on the road with my kids again.
    -To be in love again
    -A paid day off
    -to never be so big that my stomach giggles when I brush my teeth.

  • At 11:55 AM , Blogger Akelamalu said...

    Dance like nobody's watching, live like there's no tomorrow!


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