Let There Be Light

Today is my birthday, marking 29 years on this beautiful planet. Still, birthdays always bring me down a little bit, which my astrologer says is to be expected: “Beware of any day that is celebrated with candles; the candles are used to offset the darkness that most of us feel.”

On the very upside, though, my wonderful step-Mom sent me a new outfit, and it fell right off me. Well, not right off, but I was able to easily take the pants off without unbuttoning them, which could come in handy, I suppose.

Especially if one were to, say, meet a married German guy in a cheesy hotel bar during a business trip and go back to his room and get to know him better, though not totally, but enough to know that, yes, European men have a whole different concept of what constitutes as underwear. *

Hypothetically speaking, of course.

So, to celebrate pulling my pants down and a pretty great set of 29 years, I’m going to keep preparing for another 29 amazing years. A kick-ass workout, a leafy green salad, a run with the Dodger dog, a little songwriting and a hot bath are in the cards tonight.

Total Snoozeville, I admit, but there’s a lot to be said for getting to bed on time so I can get to Saturday’s farmers’ market early and flirt with the homemade salsa guy (both of them so spicy!).

You know, this whole physical transformation for me -- from the hair, to the fitness, to trying to remain more conscious of the “vibe” I’m putting out to people -- was born out of frustration, frustration that people I thought mattered were failing to see my true qualities. (Why, hello, self-absorbed Aries nature! Nice to meet y... wait, let's focus on me some more.)

I started this endeavor thinking that -- right, wrong or indifferent -- being my “best” self in every sense of the word would allow me more options, that I could be the one deciding when someone wasn’t up to my standards, and not the other way around.

I wish I could say that I’ve shaken that external motivation, but the fact is, it’s only been reinforced now that I’m turning heads again and ex-boyfriends are sending “Hey, you look great. We should get together” messages.

I just find it hard to believe that 15 stupid pounds and some hair color can make THAT much difference, so I have to assume that maybe my inner beauty has also improved, too.

Or maybe I just think too highly of people and we are that superficial.

Nah. I have enough awesome people in my life to disprove that theory, the very same people I often forget to tell how much they mean to me. It seems to me the key to having a happy birthday is not to dwell on who’s missing from the “party” but who’s already there.

Welp, I’ve got plenty of birthday love to go around, so let’s all light a candle and make a wish today. Oh, and stop by The Maiden Metallurgist, who is my Birthday Twin, with good tidings!

In the Comments section, tell me what your wish is. I don't believe in superstitions, so I’ll share mine: a true and comfortable love. That shouldn’t be so hard, right?


*Not proud of it, mind you, but I’ve found that at the very least, every bad judgment call makes a pretty good story.