123Valerie Strikes Again

Unprecedented Self-Indulgence.

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Bowled Over

Living with JennyJenny8675309 means, among other cool things like a permanant stock of ice cream and lots of power tools, that toilet seats are never left up in our house.

So, you can imagine the suprise when my bum was shocked awake by the Artic cold of toilet water this morning.

"Yiieeeeeehhhhhha," is a pretty close approximation of what I said. Then, "Holy Christ, what the fuck? Goddamnit, shit fire asshole."

Suddenly there was a polite knock at the door. "Mees, es you okay?" Ah hah. Contractors. JennyJenny's having some new flooring put in.

"Yes, thank you. Just the toilet seat was up, and that doesn't happen much around here, so, you know, it's cold. "

Blank stare. I was trying to find the Spanish word for toilet seat to no avial. Anyone know? They're going to be around all week, so it's best we get this straightened out now.

In the Comments section, tell me if you know the Spanish word for toilet seat. Muchas gracias.



  • At 12:42 PM , Blogger mist1 said...

    I know how to say beer in Spanish. That could come in useful too.

  • At 1:37 PM , Blogger Matt said...

    I don't know the Spanish word for Spanish in Spanish. I think it starts with an E or something.

    Hmmm, it's better than the alternative. It's better than sitting down in WARM water.

  • At 1:59 PM , Blogger you'dneverguess said...

    asiento de lavabo
    asiento de bano would probably work too, or just asiento
    El asiento fue arriba - the seat was up
    Dame un bebido - give me a drink
    Dame un beso - give me a kiss
    Dame un abrazo - give me a hug

  • At 2:05 PM , Anonymous 123V said...

    Cervaza es muy bueno, Senorita Mist Una.

    espanol, Senior Matty. I've got to concede to that, my friend. Ick.

    Guess, you are the best. I'm going to practice outloud. The people at work already think I'm nuts, so at least they'll think I'm a bilingual crack pot.

    The "Dame un abrazo" command will come in handy, too.

  • At 2:50 PM , Blogger EsLocura said...

    Despues de usar el bano, por favor bajen el asiento. (after using the bathroom, please put the seat down) or despues de urinal por favor bajen el asiento. (after urinating please put the seat down)or Substitute "carajo" for the word please which can mean hell, damn, fuck depending on what spanish country you are from.
    Of course, the whole beer or give me a kiss could be helpful. if that doesn't work, tell 'em to call me, damn their insensitivity

  • At 3:02 PM , Blogger Johnny said...

    Esta fuego in tu pantalones.

    (There's fire in your pants!)


  • At 3:11 PM , Anonymous 123V said...

    Welcome EsLocura! You're my kind of people--thanks so much. Do you think I will appear less rude if I offer the contractors a beer whilst asking them to put the seat down? I don't want to be one of those people.

    Johnny Strawberry, it burns only for you. Contrary to popular belief, though, I am not a fire crotch. Nor does it burn when I pee. Your blog won't let me leave comments any more, dude. What's going on over there?

  • At 4:13 PM , Blogger you'dneverguess said...

    De nada Val. I wish I was more proficient en Espanol. I get by alright though. I'm teaching KB some basic Spanish and that's helping me too. I'm glad that you are practicing. Practicarlo mucho (practice it a lot).
    Are you a fellow two-tone? Through pure genetics I am as well. I used to color the hair on my head, but stopped a while ago so now it's back to my natural color. The other stuff has always been a different color.

  • At 9:31 PM , Blogger EsLocura said...

    thanks for the welcome, I've been one of the those lurker peeps for a while. As for the beer, every request always seem sweeter with an alcoholic beverage in hand, at least that's been my experience.

  • At 10:10 PM , Blogger James Burnett said...

    asiento de lavabo. living in miami has taught me a lot.

  • At 1:08 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    Heck yes, Guess! The curtains have never matched the drapes. I love languages. I think I'm going to head back to school for the master's.

    EsLocura, I love the way you think. Glad you felt comfortable enough to come out of the dark. Cheers to you!

    James Burnett, has it taught you how to make a good Cuban sandwich? I love those.


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