I've Got it Covered

When I was a wee lass of about four, the last time I had brown hair as a matter of fact, I used to cover my nose with one hand while the other hand discretely rooted around for boogers.

Always advanced for my age, I thought I had devised a brilliant plan to keep people from guessing what I was doing under there. The funny thing is that, while I'm sure I fooled no one, especially given the infamous booger trail I left across the Continental United States from 1984 to 1986, I was never called out on it.

Because of the hygienic leeway afforded to me back then, I seem to have grown up believing that I can do whatever the hell I want now. Ya'll will be glad to know that I have graduated to tissues (most of the time), but I found myself in the grocery store tonight for my daily visit to the foodland paradise.

I'd just come from the gym, and my sweaty bra was hindering my shopping experience. Before I could even reason or talk myself out of it, I was shimmying out of my bra, expertly pulling it from out of my shirt like only a woman can (and possibly a few drag queens).

Lest you worry I was uncouth about the whole affair, I had the decency to duck behind the banana "tree" located in the cereal section, aisle 5. There was, however, a gentleman in the poultry section stationed caddywhompus to me. Let's just say he was going to get some drumsticks, but he picked up a package of breasts instead.

Yes! In the Comments section, tell me the last classy thing you did in public without thinking.