Into the Groove

After an obnoxious amount of tater tots and a 14-hour Law & Order SVU marathon, I finally feel strong enough to try and piece together the events of last night.

As Matty reports, my friend, Queen Z, did in fact win a most dangerous happy-hour set up: $20 all you can drink for a solid three hours. Ooof. I trained for weeks before to get into top shape.

Lisa Lisa and I made our way to the bar and waited for the gang while trying to keep our drinks roofie free--no easy task at a college bar where the bartender ripped off beer caps with his teeth. That can't be hygienic.

Fortunately, the troops filtered in: Matty, Kate and #1Laura arrived looking all hot and stuff.

I was working on a personal best--replacing my blood with bourbon. The unfortunate side effect was that I spent most of the night in the loo. Apparently, this place is known for getting people obliterated because it had a lotion lady whose sole purpose was to pump soap for me, hand me paper towels and remind me to "pull up your damn pants."

I have guilt issues and thus forked over a small fortune in tips to the lotion lady and heaped on praise like, "Wow! You dispense soap so well!" I tried to hug her, but she was Not. Having. It.

However, one of my many trips to the restroom did yield some superior hugging.

I was drying my hands with the paper towel the lotion lady handed me when I heard, "Val!" coming across the bathroom. My name can be found on a lot of bathroom walls, so I wasn't too surprised at first. But then I looked up to see a lovely sprite of a woman and, behold, it was my friend Tinz--in town to visit with some college friends of hers and Megan Jane's who had converged in D.C. Wheeee! Surprise!

See, Tinz is one of my beloved D.C. Sisters, an online women's group. I've come to know her over the past year, but last night was the first we've met in person.

Oh, there was much hugging and squealing, and I was glad to still be in the bathroom because I kind of peed my pants a little bit. After the rejoicing, I returned my focus to the matter at hand: getting el drunko ridiculoso. Megan Jane Barbara Jones, Har Har Harwell, Sean P.K. and EJ all showed up to help out, too!

I am sorry to report that I knocked back enough bourbon to put my brain to sleep, thus my limbs took over and said, "Dance! Dance, I say!"

I wasn't the only one afflicted with this malady, as some of your favorite bloggers were definitely shaking their groove things. And trying to start fights. In my defense, I never said Matty's Dad "died." I said "passed." If the guy would have listened, he would have heard the full story: "His Dad passed ... out Sweet Tarts at Halloween."

In any case, the guy actually gave me a hug afterward, so all's well that ends well. I'm going to apply to the United Nations and put my diplomacy skills to work. Hugo Chavez is a nut case, but I think he just needs a good hug.

Talking with Megan Jane this morning, she said something that struck me: "You know, V, half the fun of going out is debriefing about it the next day." So true. Well, actually, most of the fun comes from making out with cute boys. Not me, sad to say (High five Lisa Lisa and #1Laura!), though Matty did give me a noogie, and I repeatedly dropped it like it was hot with some of my favoritist peeps. Erm, nah. I still would have preferred the making out.

In the Comments section, tell me if you've ever been in a fight and/or if you like SVU or Criminal Intent more. I lurve Vincent Donofrio, but the SVU kids just come more correct, ya know?