Hay Strangers

My sister married a country boy. He grows 700-pound pumpkins for the county fair, wears camouflage to church and can slaughter a pig. We love him.

We grew up in a part of the country where people showed their love and respect for each other by "tagging" things: overpasses, water towers, sheep, etc. Yes, I am from Ohio.

My brother-in-law's surname is Baker. Most of his friends call him Bake, though, because there is less chance that their dip will fall out of their mouth if they omit the last syllable, the "er." Fact. (Try it with your tongue where the tabaccer might go. I ain't lying.)

In any case, Bake is a highly regarded individual, so in several Southern Ohio locales, you can drive by and see "Hay Bake" on various structures, not limited to, but including, a natural gas pump, a corn silo and a Jeep Wrangler circa 1984 that's been parked in the same spot for nigh two decades. His friends, though very dear and quite skilled on four-wheelers, aren't so hot at grammar.

I'm sorry I've been absent, but as a show of my love for all of you, lookit what I did:



That's how we roll. You can take the girl out of Ohio, but you can't take the Ohio out of the girl. Nothing but the best for you.

I've been busy, kids. Good, but busy. In the past week I may or may not have:

1. Started a new job that is the secret to my eternal happiness
2. Played an open mic night without freaking out too much, thanks to my loverly friends
3. Ruptured my spleen from those crazy lol cats at I Can Has Cheezburger?
4. Cried liked a big, old baby and moped around because my darling Megan Jane is moving away so she can become Dr. Megan Jane
5. Peed my pants a little bit because Adele and Justin are coming into town for Justin's big art show
6. Had my heart broken and pieced together more than a few times
7. Eaten an entire salami by myself

Please forgive me if I'm not around a whole lot in the next few weeks, okay (largely due to that whole salami thing, I think)? Just know there is a water tower in suburban Maryland that's a shining beacon of my love and esteem for you.

In the Comments section, tell me how you roll.